Tuesday, May 17, 2016
Friday, January 22, 2016
Imagine waking up on a beautiful winter morning. One of those that people write songs about. Looking out of the window, you see an expense of pristine white show framed by the azure sky. If you close your eyes, you swear you can hear the tiny tingling of sleigh bells somewhere in another time. You get up, put on a pair of those ugly, but admittedly comfortable, slippers your mother keeps buying you. And inspired by the warm embrace of these mother-bought slippers, you decide today is the perfect day to frolic in the snow! So you make some hot coco, find a handmade scarf to wrap yourself in, and head out the door.
Once outside, the day is as beautiful as it is crisp. You decide to make snowman. It’s like you’re transported back to some imaginary childhood day made out of cookie dough and giggles, as you craft your very own snowman. And then, finally, it’s ready! You look at it and feel the pride of having made something with your own two hands. Pondering that, a thought occurs to you. You should record this moment so that you can remember it for years to come. And, more importantly, so that you can share it and make your friends jealous of your amazing day in snow. So you get your phone out. But…wait. Something is wrong. The phone has turned off. Upon closer inspection you realize it must be out of battery.
You feel a little silly now, because you just read that article on that site talking about that thing that makes phones lose battery charge much faster in the cold. Such is the price of a good frolic in the snow, you now realize. You are sad. You cannot take a picture of the most epic snowman ever that would have surely gone viral if only the world had had the chance to gaze at it. But your sadness is interrupted by that distant sound of sleigh bells. You hear it again, this time louder. And it keeps getting louder and louder. It’s behind you now, and you turn to see a guy driving a team of reindeer.
As you stare at the strange sight, he asks you if something is wrong. You reply that yes, actually, your phone ran out battery right as you were on the brink of Internet fame. The reindeer-driving madman shakes his head in disapproval and hands you his powerbank, telling you that you can borrow it until you get one of your own. He drives off, and as you stand there holding your phone and the powerbank that will make it possible for you to take the snowman selfie of your dreams, you realize that even a guy driving a group of Arctic animals around a highly trafficked downtown area was sane enough to know he needs a powerbank to keep his smart phone going in the cold. So you decide to buy one, too. The end.
Yep, this poor guy could very well be your future customer, so if you’re looking to buy high-quality powerbanks or other wholesale wireless accessories, frolic to our website to see our huge variety of options.
Posted by Anonymous at 4:48 PM
Friday, December 11, 2015
So…this month, we at OnZ Wireless want to announce our new series of armor phone cases. Unfortunately, they are actually so awesome that we are running out of words to describe the legendarily colossal awesomeness of gargantuan proportions, so we’re going to use all of this blog to give you a sense of the performance level that these armor cases provide through some apt comparisons.
This beastly thing is an armor for rider and horse ordered by Sigismund II Augustus in the 16th century. Sigismund (catchy name) was the King of Poland and Grand Duke of Lithuania, so if you’ve ever felt like you want to be the king of a small European country, or the grand duke of an even smaller European country, this is the kind of getup you’d be looking at, in terms of a quick grocery store run. Or you can just skip the pesky responsibilities of a dictator (what do you mean no taxation without representation?) and go with an armor case for your phone instead, because it is at least as royally impressive as this little thing.
Do You Believe You Can Fly?
Have you ever thought to yourself that you would like to have a badass blood-red armor that allows you to fly, drop bombs and arrest intergalactic criminals? Let’s face it, who hasn’t. That is literally all we think about while staring mindlessly at our monitors. Now, while our armor phone cases don’t give you the ability to fly, bomb things or be the space police (please don’t try them at home and then sue us), it does come in an awesome shade of red that definitely matches the Ironman armor both in color and durability. And surely that’s what is truly important about being a superhero playboy millionaire with a heart of pure energy: Your phone case matching your outfit.
You Wanna Tank It?
This little Sunday drive vehicle is the Black Panther tank, designed by the South Korean army and known as one of the most advanced high tech tanks in the world. Not only do our armor cases come in way more colors than this tank, they are also pretty much as strong and high-tech as it is. Sources tell us that it’s totally possible that the South Korean army driving this tank is protecting their cellphones (no texting while driving!) with our armor cases.
There you go. That’s approximately how awesome our new armor cases are, but if you need more info, feel free to contact us or to test them out yourself.
Posted by Anonymous at 10:40 AM